Episode 121: Overcoming the Odds: A Daughter's Journey with Parental Incarceration

In this powerful episode, Christina "Pip" Pipkin shares her personal story of growing up with a father who was wanted by the FBI. Despite the challenges she faced, Pip found her way to success, becoming an educator and pursuing a doctorate. She reflects on the crucial role her teachers and community played in shaping her path, and explores the profound impact of parental incarceration on children. Pip advocates for the use of technology to maintain connections between incarcerated parents and their children, highlighting the potential to break the cycle of incarceration and create positive change.

Transcript

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If you're a parent, teacher or school leader and you're sick and tired of the frustration, anger and unfair treatment of children at high risk in our public schools, then perhaps it's time for all of us to do something about it. In this podcast, Dr amitra Berry brings you tips, tools, strategies and tactics to build successful solutions while touching, moving and inspiring all of us to transform our schools so that every child thrives. Here's your host. Dr Berry, Wanted by the FBI, arrest warrants have been issued, and authorities seek help in finding the suspect. In many cases, rewards are offered for tips leading to an arrest and conviction. Christopher Pipkin, age 35 Wanted by the FBI Violent Crime Task Force for parole violations stemming from 1985 aggravated robbery conviction. FBI officials said that he should be considered armed and dangerous. This is a newspaper clipping from 1997 Christopher Pipkin is my dad in 1997 I turned 11. To say this impacted me is an understatement. This has affected so many parts of my life, including my feelings towards law enforcement and my feelings about recidivism, or the tendency of a convicted criminal to reoffend. My name is Christina Pipkin, though most people know me as Pip. I'm a native Texan, born in Dallas, raised in Houston, where I've built a lovely life, incredible family, fantastic wife. Will have been married eight years this year coming, this coming December, I graduated from Ailey Hastings High School, and after graduation, I pursued my passion for education at Spelman College in Atlanta, Georgia, where I earned my bachelor's in early childhood development. For about eight years, there were lovely, wonderful, fantastic years I worked as a primary school teacher, focusing primarily on second and third grade curriculum. After leaving the classroom, I transitioned into the ed tech world. So education technology, in this new capacity, I have helped school districts integrate personalized learning tools that truly make a difference in students educational experiences, making sure that they're getting an individualized approach to their learning and getting exactly what they need. Meeting the student where they are in 2020 I earned a master's degree in curriculum and instruction with instructional technology from Houston Christian University, formerly known as Houston Baptist University, currently, I'm taking on the next chapter of my academic journey, pursuing a doctorate in education, leadership, technology out of the New Jersey City University. But how did I get here, growing up with a father who was wanted by the FBI. By the time I was 11, my path could have easily taken a different turn. Yet, against the odds, I found my way here, educated, married, happy, figuring out adulthood. I'm often asked, How did I avoid becoming a statistic. That question drives me as I continue my work and studies, striving to create opportunities for others to break free from the narratives that are imposed on them. I want you to close your eyes or find a quiet space, or if you are anything like me, and listen to podcasts while driving. Turn on your listening ears to really lean in and join me on and journey back to 1995 1996 that school year, that year, I was nine years old, a third grader living in Dallas, Texas. It was a time when the world felt big and mysterious, and I was still discovering my place in it. Among the many memories of that year, one stands out vividly. Miss Williams. I love that teacher. She was my third grade teacher. She was the first black teacher I ever had, and she left an incredible mark on my life. Though I can't recall her first name, and it drives me bananas. I remember the warmth and the strength she radiated. She had this remarkable ability to make each of us, every single one of her students, feel seen and valued, even now, I wish I could find her to tell her how much she meant to me and to thank her for that spark shape nighted in me so many years ago. It was in her classroom that I discovered my love for learning and teaching, a passion that has stayed with me ever since that moment of being with Miss Williams. Although Miss Williams might not have known the details of my life at home, like how my dad was often in and out of incarceration, but she paid attention to me in ways that mattered. I remember staying after school, not because of any particular club, but just to help her with the classroom tasks, you know, tidying up after the end of the school day, stacking the chairs, helping her grade papers, all the things that as a kid you love to do to help out your teacher. It felt good to be there in that safe, nurturing space. Miss Williams was a crucial part of my village, a guardian of sorts during a time of uncertainty in my life. That summer, as I turned 10, my life took an unexpected turn, like every other summer, I was sent to Houston to stay with my grandmother. My mom was firm in not wanting my older sister, who was six years older to me, older than me, to miss out on her own childhood by looking after me. So off I went, unaware that this trip would be different. While in Houston, my grandmother and I, we found a new home, and soon after my mother and sister joined me. The reason for the move was clear. My family hoped that a change of environment might help my dad break free from the cycles that kept pulling him into trouble. For a brief moment, things felt normal. There was a fleeting sense of stability, fragile hope that things were going to get back to normal. Things were going to end up on the straight and narrow, but one particular day shattered that illusion. We were driving somewhere I can't recall, you know, a child's brain, your concept of direction and things that you remember sit differently as a child than it does as an adult. All I remember is that we were in our old brown sedan, maybe a Buick or Chevy, and I was in the back seat feeling content, when suddenly, police sirens blared behind us. My dad pulled over and I felt a chill run down my spine. The tension in the car was so thick, my parents exchanged word glances and whispered words I couldn't hear, and quite frankly, as a child, I probably didn't need to hear. The officer took my dad's ID and insurance, then returned to his patrol car. When he came back, he asked my dad to step out of the car. Fear gripped me as I watched my father and that man I looked up to, despite of all his flaws, be handcuffed and led away, My heart pounded as I saw him place in the back of that police car. The image of my dad disappearing behind those tinted windows is etched in my memory, my mom and I drove away. My mom in silence, me holding back tears, and I think she was too. We headed to my Mom's best friend's house. I call her the Apollo, who was more family than friend. Her house was always a sanctuary full of life and laughter as she had six kids running around, and I always instantly had friends to play with being there, but that day, I felt distant from the usual joy I was drawn to the hushed conversation between my mom and my Thea. I had so many questions swirling in my head. Why did they take my dad. Where was he going? When would I see him again? How would my mom manage everything on her own? The weight of those questions were was heavy, and the answer seemed elusive. I had no idea when I would actually find the answers to these questions. Looking back, I see how these moments, both joyful and painful, wove together to form the tapestry of my childhood, the lessons from Miss Williams, the resilience of my mother, the love for my grandmother and my the Apollo, they all contributed to the person I am today. These memories are a testament to the power of community and the unspoken support that can lift a child through difficult times. I share this story to provide context without knowing my background, meeting my sister me might lead to assumptions about our upbringing. Many might envision a middle class home with engaged, working parents, actively involved in our education. However, the reality is quite different. We are anomalies. Given the statistic that children with an incarcerated parent are six times more likely to become incarcerated themselves, we avoided that statistic. We are an anomaly. This suggests children of incarcerated parents are significant. Significantly more likely to follow a similar pathway. It's a sobering thought when considering the impact of parental incarceration on a child's future. Let's take a moment and think about those individuals who have generations of parents and family members incarcerated. Their trajectory reflects this challenge across multiple generations. What if their grandparents and their great grandparents have all experienced incarceration, shaping their family's journey across three generations? This reality starkly increases the likelihood of the subsequent generations facing similar situations and struggles. Addressing the school to prison pipeline demands a comprehensive approach encompassing policy reform and a thorough examination of the deep rooted, systemic issues the phenomenon of incarceration in America has throughout history, led to the fracturing of family dynamics of countless families, countless Families as the numbers of incarcerated parents continue to rise, so does the number of children navigating through life without their presence and guidance of their parents at home. This disruption and absence and the lives of affected children have profound and long lasting impacts, including in their educational pursuits, the void left by an incarcerated parent can manifest in academic struggles and emotional turmoil, highlighting the importance of maintaining parental connections, even from behind bars, demonstrating a continuous commitment to parenting despite the physical separation becomes crucial for incarcerated parents striving to retain their parental rights and roles despite these challenges, the access and increasing availability of technology within correctional systems offers a glimmer of hope. Innovations such as video conferencing not only serve to bridge the physical gap between incarcerated parents and their children, but also provide a means through which parents can actively participate in and support their children's educational matriculation. This technological bridge offers a lifeline of potentially minimizing some of the adverse child effects, or ACE for parental incarceration on children's academic performance and emotional well being. Leveraging technology to maintain and strengthen family connectedness could stand as a path forward to minimize the impact of incarceration on family unity and the children's future, although representing less than 5% of the global population. The United States, astonishingly, has 25% of the world's incarcerated individuals. That statistic is further compounded by a 500% surge in the nation's incarceration rate over the past four decades. The repercussions of this trend extend far beyond the individuals incarcerated, deeply affecting the families, particularly their children and the caregivers. A significant portion of research highlights the disproportionate impact of incarceration on communities of color, specifically black and brown families, with devastating consequences. For instance, a New York Times article titled family separation, it's a problem for us citizens too, illustrates a harsh reality, stating that one in four black children in the United States is likely to experience parental incarceration before reaching the age 14. The absence of a parent due to incarceration creates a ripple effect of negative outcomes for children, according to scholarly research, these children face a plethora of challenges, including struggles with mental health, declining academic performance, an increased likelihood of experiencing homelessness or entering the foster Care System themselves, and the heightened risk of future incarceration. The problem is clear and pressing. The pervasive issue of parental incarceration is not only a matter of criminal justice but also a significant public health concern affecting the well being and future prospects of countless children, while the problem is multifaceted with several different complicated layers, as I mentioned before, there's a possibility of hope through the utilization of technology, the increasing accessibility of digital communication tools within correctional facilities offers a pathway to eliminate some of these adverse childhood effects that I mentioned. These effects are experienced by children of incarcerated parents and have lasting impacts. Parents maintaining meaningful connections with their children while incarcerated can change the trajectory of the child's life and provide support for them. Even academically, by fostering and maintaining parental bonds through video calls, messaging and other digital platforms. These technologies can help nourish the parent to child relationship. It can even strengthen the parent to caregiver relationship, providing emotional support and stability during a period of separation. This technological bridge, though not a complete remedy, represents a vital step towards addressing the profound challenges faced by families torn apart by incarceration. Now listen, I know that there are so many different pieces of the puzzle when it comes to the school to prison pipeline, I know my lane. I know my influence. I am not a politician. I do not want to go after and fight after policies. This is such a deep rooted, systemic issue. It took over 400 years to create this it's going to take a long time to dismantle it, but I feel that there's things that we can do right now, there are things within our realm of influence right now that we can do to help change the trajectory of these students. They do not have to become part of that alarming statistic when thinking about strengthening relationships between incarcerated parents and their children, there are three critical relationships that we have to think about, the relationship between the parent and the child and the caregiver. In many instances, the caregiver ends up being the gatekeeper between the relationship of the child and that parent. The significance of focusing on the connection between incarcerated parents and their children through the use of technology is complex addressing critical, social, emotional, educational and even policy dimensions this topic carries the potential to promote positive change at the individual, family, institutional and even societal levels, advocating for more innovative, compassionate and effective approach to addressing these complex challenges faced by parents suffering from incarceration and the impact it has on their children is a huge step forward the long term effects of strengthening these relationships now can positively alter the future of the children, and let's be honest, even the parents, it can change the trajectory of the parent. They now have something to fight for. They now have something to want to be positive and that be a positive influence for ultimately assisting in lowering the number of children becoming offenders and incarcerated later in life. This is going to have a lasting impact and impression on our society as a whole. As an educator that has been impacted by parental incarceration, I find myself asking these questions, how does parental incarceration during childhood and adolescence impact the educational attainment, employment outcomes, social relationships and mental health all the way through adulthood? What role does technological interventions such as video conferencing play in maintaining the relationship between incarcerated parents and their children, and how do these technologies affect the children's perception of parental support and their own academic and emotional well being? How does recidivism among incarcerated parents influence the stability and development of their children over time, and what are the implications for family dynamics? What are the available technologies that exist that are appropriate for incarcerated families and children to have meaningful connections with right now? What are the lasting impacts technology enabled interactions have on the emotional well being of children with incarcerated parents? And lastly, the last question that plagues me, how can technology enable incarcerated parents to contribute to their children's academic journey? Can it allow the incarcerated parent to participate in school activities like homework assistance or joining during a parent conference? Okay, so I'm sure many of you are curious. You want to know what happened to my dad? I gave you a bit of a background about me. Told you a little bit about my dad being Wanted by the FBI, but now what? Where is he now? Well, I am happy to report that he is no longer incarcerated or on parole. This has been over 50. Years, probably at this point now, I'll have to fact check. I'll double check with him how long he's actually been off of parole, but at least 15 years. I feel like it's longer than that. At this point, He currently works for prison ministry, Prison Fellowship, where he has the opportunity to go and speak the word of God, speak life into prisoners that are currently incarcerated, helping them to find new life, new light and a new way, path forward to a different outcome for their future. He is also a pastor of his own church, where the church is focused on supporting families of incarcerated people. His Church is right outside of Dallas and Garland, Texas, and I wanted to give you just a little bit of an update about my extended Village, my extended village of aunts and uncles. They are still extremely important part of my life. They have been crucial with helping navigate through the woes of adulthood. I jokingly say adulting is ghetto. I have a friend that says adulthood is the worst hood and it's difficult. It's very complicated to know how to be an adult and how to be a meaningful addition to society. My extended village has more times than I can count, supported me through this transition of adulthood and navigating life, and I thank them greatly and immensely, my sister, my best friend, my competent she is forever going to be my writer for life. I don't know what we would do without each other growing up together with all of the heartaches and complications that we've experienced as children growing up and my mother, she has raised two remarkably talented and beautiful children, me being one of them, and I am so grateful for everything that she's done. Her village was, and still is, a mighty force to be reckoned with, and I am so grateful that she had access, she had the ability to lean on people that were going to support her and her children through that difficult time of having her husband incarcerated. So what's an equity warrior to do? What actions can.